Respect Outweighs money and wealth in a relationship - Mercy's Insights

Nairobi,

Thursday, 20 February, 2025 

McCreadie Andias 

In Kenya, where love and money often collide, one truth is becoming clearer—money can’t buy peace of mind. Many women who never entered relationships for financial gain are proving that respect and emotional well-being matter far more than material comfort. 

The belief that wealth alone can compensate for emotional neglect is being challenged, with more people speaking up about the importance of mutual understanding in relationships. 

While society has long placed financial provision at the heart of love, a new wave of Kenyan women and men are redefining what truly holds a relationship together: respect, trust, and emotional safety.

"A woman who never loved you for your money is a woman who values you beyond the material support . So if you think you can emotionally abuse her and she’s supposed to be okay because she’s enjoying the “money “ jokes on you ! She will leave you with all the money and go find peace elsewhere even to another man who can’t give her half of the money you have. "Says Mercy Maasai, A notable Kenyan influencer. 

"Love is not all about money , it’s about mutual understanding and respect . Another thing , you can’t claim to be loving a person whom you’ve betrayed and you keep on hurting them , love means a huge sacrifice sometimes, you can’t be selfish and claim to be in love ! "Masai adds. 

This assertion challenges the notion that financial provision can compensate for emotional neglect or abuse.

In many Kenyan communities, there's a belief that financial stability is the cornerstone of a successful relationship. However, this perspective can be misleading. Domestic abuse remains pervasive, with many women tolerating it due to societal pressures and economic dependency. Yet, a significant number choose to leave affluent partners in pursuit of peace and respect, underscoring that wealth cannot mask emotional maltreatment. 

Neema Shiqs, a prominent Kenyan social commentator, emphasizes the importance of mutual respect over financial allure: "Love is not a contract of financial obligation. Your bills and lifestyle are your responsibility, not his." Her words resonate with many Kenyan women who advocate for financial independence and emotional fulfillment in relationships. 

Similarly, discussions on platforms like TikTok reveal candid insights into the dynamics of love and money in Kenya. Users highlight the mental health implications of staying in financially comfortable yet emotionally abusive relationships, advocating for a balance between material support and emotional well-being. 

Kenyan society stands at a cultural crossroads where traditional expectations meet modern realities. While financial provision has long been seen as a man's duty, there's a growing recognition that emotional support and mutual respect are equally vital. This shift is evident in the increasing number of women prioritizing their mental health over societal expectations, even if it means leaving affluent partners.

Psychologists attribute the tendency to remain in abusive relationships to trauma bonding, where victims develop emotional attachments to their abusers. This complex dynamic often traps individuals in cycles of abuse, making it challenging to leave despite the availability of financial resources.